史上最爆笑英语笑话

笑一笑，十年少，生活需要笑话，以下是小编为大家整理的史上最爆笑英语笑话，一起来爆笑吧!

史上最爆笑英语笑话(一)

Honey, said the husband to his wife, I invited a friend home for supper.

“亲爱的，”丈夫对妻子说：“我邀请了一位朋友回家吃晚饭。”

What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I havent been shopping, all the dishes are dirty,and I dont feel like cooking a fancy meal!

“什么?你疯了吗?我们的房子乱糟糟的，我很久没有买过东西回来了，所有的碗碟都是脏的，还有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚饭。”

I know all that.

“这些我全都知道。”

Then why did you invite a friend for supper?

“那你为什么还要邀请朋友回来吃晚饭?”

Because the poor fools thinking about getting married.

“因为那个可怜的笨蛋正考虑要结婚呢。”

史上最爆笑英语笑话(二)

image1977: The British newspaper The Guardian published a special seven-page supplement devoted to San Serriffe, a small republic said to consist of several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean. A series of articles affectionately described the geography and culture of this obscure nation. Its two main islands were named Upper Caisse and Lower Caisse. Its capital was Bodoni, and its leader was General Pica. The Guardian's phones rang all day as readers sought more information about the idyllic holiday spot. Only a few noticed that everything about the island was named after printer's terminology。

1977年愚人节，英国卫报发行了长达7页的增刊，全是介绍San Serriffe这个印度洋上的小岛国的，据说那里有好几个分号形状的小岛。文章中大肆渲染了这里的风情和民俗，介绍了它的城市和首都，甚至总统的名字。当天卫报编辑室的电话都被读者打爆了，大家都想知道这样美好的度假胜地在哪。只有少数人注意到，首都名字Bodoni是印刷术语，是一种印刷字体的名称。

史上最爆笑英语笑话(三)

The lecturer on evolution had been going on for nearly two hours. then he started again, and said he:"Let me ask the evolutionist a question --- if we had tails like a baboon, where are they?"

教进化论的老师已经滔滔不绝地讲了快两个小时，他的话题又来了：“让我向进化论者提个问题——如果我们曾经像狒狒那样长着尾巴，那么现在尾巴到哪里去了?”

"I'll venture an answer, " said an old lady. "We have worn them off sitting here so long.".

“我来试试看，”一位老太太说。“该是我们在这里坐这么久把它们磨掉了吧。”