幽默感十足的英语笑话

会讲笑话的人都是有好人缘的人，所以我们要多亲近一些笑话大王们。现在小编也来当笑话大王啦!小编给大家收集整理了幽默感十足的英语笑话，一起来笑笑，收集好人缘吧!

幽默感十足的英语笑话一

There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish icefishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win — they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what the brunettes were doing differently. A few minutes later, the blonde comes running back.

“A hole! You need to put a hole in the ice!”

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?” The father, surprised, answers, “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.” This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks. “Yes, dead from the root up and the balls are just for decoration.”

A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold."

The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it.

Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?"

She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

幽默感十足的英语笑话二

一、A: Would you like to be the sun in my life?

你想成为我生命中的太阳吗?

B: Aww, Yes!

哇哦!当然想。

A: Very well, then. Stay 99558876 miles away from me.

很好，那么赶紧到距离我99558876里远的地方吧。

二、B: How much do you love me?

你有多么喜欢我?

A: As many as the stars in the sky.

和天上的星星一样多。

B: Good! ... Wait! It's daytime now...

太好了...等等，现在是白天啊!

A: There's no stars in the sky in the daytime.

没错，白天的天空上没有星星。