跳转到主要内容

有趣的英语笑话故事

总是有些时候莫名其妙的不开心,心情不佳的时候就会办什么都不在状态,你会这样么?这里小编收集整理了有趣的英语笑话故事,让你的心情速速好起来。

有趣的英语笑话故事一:Bad Parrot

A man named Fred owned a parrot that hardly ever stoped talking. One day the man was going to have an old friend over so he told the parrot to be quiet or else he would flush him. The parrot kept talking and the man warned him again. It didn't work. The parrot kept right on talking. The man took the parrot and flushed him down the toilet. When Fred's friend arived he asked if he could use the bathroom. Fred said sure it is the first door on the right. When the man comes out he asks Fred if he has a tape player in the bathroom. Fred says no and than asks why. The man tells Fred that he heard something say "I see your heini, looks so shiny." So Fred and his friend go in there and Fred sees his parrot going in circles singing "Floatin' Down The River On A Big Brown Log"

有趣的英语笑话故事二:Good Doggie

One fall day Bill was out raking leaves when he noticed a hearse slowly drive by. Following the first hearse was a second hearse, which was followed by a man walking solemnly along, followed by a dog, and then about 200 men walking in single file.

Intrigued, Bill went up to the man following the second hearse and asked him who was in the first hearse."My wife," the man replied. "I'm sorry," said Bill."What happened to her?" "My dog bit her and she died."

Bill then asked the man who was in the second hearse.The man replied, "My mother-in-law. My dog bit her and she died as well." Bill thought about this for a while. He finally asked the man, "Can I borrow your dog?"

To which the man replied, "Get in line."

有趣的英语笑话故事三:Investigating a terrible accident

There was a terrible bus accident. Unfortunately, no one survived the accident except a monkey which was on board and there were no witnesses. The police try to investigate further but they get no results. At last, they try to interrogatethe monkey. The monkey seems to respond to their questions with gestures. Seeing that, they start asking the questions.

The police chief asks, "What were the people doing on the bus?"

The monkey shakes his head in a condemning manner and starts dancing around; meaning the people were dancing and having fun.

The chief asks, "Yeah, but what else were they doing?".

The monkey uses his hand and takes it to his mouth as if holding a bottle.

The chief says, "Oh! They were drinking, huh??!" The chief continues, "Okay, were they doing anything else?"

The monkey nods his head and moves his mouth back and forth, meaning they were talking.

The chief loses his patience, "If they were having such a great time, who was driving the stupid bus then?"

The monkey cheerfully swings his arms to the sides as if grabbing a wheel.rrible accident

有趣的英语笑话故事四:The Hunting Dog

Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, "I'll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren't any ducks out there, I'm not going hunting."

So he sends the dog out to the pond. The dog comes back and barks twice. Chester says, "Well I'm not going to go out. He only saw two ducks out there."

Earl says, "You're going to take the dog's barks for the truth?" Earl doesn't believe it, so he goes to look for himself. When he gets back he says, "I don't believe it where did you get that dog? There really are only two ducks out there!"

Chester says, "Well, I got him from the breeder up the road. If you want, you can get one from him, too."

So Earl goes to the breeder and says he wants a dog like the one his friend Chester has. The breeder obliges and Earl brings the dog home, tells it to go out and look for ducks. Minutes later the dog returns with a stick in it's mouth and starts humping Earl's leg.

Outraged, Earl takes the dog back to the breeder and says, "This dog is a fraud. I want my money back!"

The breeder asks Earl what the dog did. So Earl tells him that when he sent the dog out to look for ducks, it came back with a stick in its mouth and started humping his leg.

The breeder says, "Earl, all he was trying to tell you was that there are more fucking ducks out there than you can shake a stick at!"


有趣的英语笑话故事相关笑话

搞笑精彩小笑话故事大全

一女生深夜返校,被男人拦住劫色,女生主动把裙子拉起来,男人当即把裤子褪下去……女生回宿舍密告室友,室友惊问结果如何?女生问:你说一个提着裙子的女人和一个提着裤子的男人谁跑的快?是不是很好笑呢?…

巨冷幽默笑话故事

巨冷幽默笑话故事:食堂中午菜单有红烧鸡,每份八毛。小丽在去食堂的路上碰到已经买好菜的同学,便问:中午有啥好菜?同学答曰:红烧鸡八毛!更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!巨冷幽默笑话故事(一)…

新鲜逗趣笑话故事

曹操出征。与小妾于帐中行乐。因旅途劳顿,很快熄火。妾不依要再来。孟德曰:鸡累,鸡累!杨修路帐而过,当晚众军士皆知行动暗号。曰:鸡肋。第二天。杨修被斩首……是不是很好笑呢?…

超逗的笑话故事段子合集

超逗的笑话故事段子合集:妈妈对镜抚着渐黄的头发自语:“怎样才能把头发变黑呢?”儿子抢过爸爸正在用的鞋油并殷勤地递过去:“妈妈,搽点这个吧。”更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!…

生活趣侃笑话故事

生活趣侃笑话故事:有种悲哀,是坐火车睡着了坐过站!更悲哀的是,急匆匆地下车,到了出站口还得补票!更更悲哀的是,补完票出站了,自己一拍脑瓜子:晕,行李没拿!更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!…

笑翻天笑话故事搞笑集锦

“快看,那架直升机在空中已经停了五分钟啦!”“啊,怕是没油了吧!”有没有戳中你的笑点呢?今天我们就一起来看看笑翻天笑话故事搞笑集锦吧!笑翻天笑话故事搞笑集锦(一)1、今天上街,遇到一个乞丐。…

超逗的笑话故事集锦

超逗的笑话故事集锦:表演系你的眼睛眨一下,我就死过去了,你的眼睛再眨一下,我就活过来了,你的眼睛眨来眨去,我就死去活来。更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!超逗的笑话故事集锦(一)1、…

精选简短笑话故事大全笑破你的肚子

公交车上,一男子一直蹭MM,MM忍无可忍的说:“你TM别蹭我了!”男子:“谁蹭你了呀,你以为你是美女啊。”MM:“你要是帅哥,老娘也不介意你蹭!”是不是很好笑呢?…

生活精彩笑话故事大全

老乡见老乡,两眼泪汪汪,为啥两眼泪汪汪,因为钱被老乡骗光光。笑话是幽默的载体,一个成功的笑话能流传千古,听者和讲者都会感到快乐、欣喜,拍掌叫好!今天我们就一起来看看生活精彩笑话故事大全吧!…

好笑笑翻天笑话故事

好笑笑翻天笑话故事:有时候你的空间访问人里有了你想不到的人来看你,那也许不是因为她(他)关注你,而是因为,手机触屏没按好,不小心点进去了。更多精彩请关注美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!好笑笑翻天笑话故事…