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超精彩的英语笑话

以下是小编为大家带来的超精彩的英语笑话,更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!

超精彩的英语笑话(一)

An elderly lawyer was about to die. One day he told his wife he had come up with a way to take all of the money he had with him to heaven.

一个老律师就要死了。一天他告诉他妻子,他想到了一个办法可以把他所有的钱带去天堂。

He told his wife to put all of his money in the attic so when he died he could grab it on the way up.

他告诉妻子,把他所有的钱都放到阁楼,那样他去天堂的路上就可以顺便带走。

A couple of weeks after he died his wife was cleaning out the attic and saw that the money bags were still there.

他死后两三个星期,他的妻子打扫阁楼发现钱袋子还在那里。

"That old fool," she chuckled. "I told him that we should have put the money in the basement!"

“这个老傻瓜,”她窃笑着说。“早就告诉他,应该把钱放到地下室才对!”

超精彩的英语笑话(二)

A lawyer opened the door of his BMW, when suddenly a car came along and hit the door, ripping it off completely. When the police arrived at the scene, the lawyer was complaining bitterly about the damage to his precious BMW.

"Officer, look what they've done to my Beeeemer!!!", he whined.

"You lawyers are so materialistic, you make me sick!!!" retorted the officer, "You're so worried about your stupid BMW, that you didn't even notice that your left arm was ripped off!!!"

一个律师打开他的宝马车门,突然一辆汽车驶过来把门撞飞了,警察赶到现场,律师正痛苦地抱怨毁坏了他心爱的宝马。

“警察同志,看看他们把我的车弄的!!!”律师哀怨地说。

“你们律师真是物质至上,我很不舒服!”警察反驳说,“你这么关心你可恶的宝马,你可能没有注意到你的左胳膊也没了。”

律师终于注意到了血淋淋的左肩膀,“天哪,我的劳力士手表在哪儿?”

超精彩的英语笑话(三)

A man wrote a letter to a small hotel he planned to visit on his vacation: "I would very much like to bring my dog with me. He is well-groomed and very well behaved. Would you be willing to permit me to keep him in my room with me at night?"

An immediate reply came from the hotel owner, who said, "I've been operating this hotel for many years. In all that time, I've never had a dog steal towels, bedclothes, silverware or pictures off the walls. I've never had to evict a dog in the middle of the night for being drunk and disorderly. And I've never had a dog run out on a hotel bill. Yes, indeed, your dog is welcome at my hotel. And, if your dog will vouch for you, you're welcome to stay here, too."

一个人给一家他计划在假期里停留的小旅馆写了封信,“我非常希望带着我的狗,它很干净很有教养,你能允许它和我睡一间屋子吗?”

旅馆主人立即回了封信,“我经营旅馆很多年了,狗从没偷过毛巾,床单, 餐具,或者墙上的画。我也从没有在半夜因为狗喝醉胡闹而赶走它,狗也从不不付帐就跑掉。实际上我们非常欢迎您的狗来我们旅馆,如果它为您担保,也欢迎您来。

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