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英语笑话

简单的英语笑话故事

你知道学些笑话的好处么?当第一次见面的时候,总是有不知道该说什么的尴尬,这时候你就需要一些笑话,来缓解一下气氛呢,这里小编为你收集整理了简单的英语笑话故事,希望能对你有所帮助哈!

简单的英语笑话故事一:Things Were Tougher Then

There were three prostitutes living together, a mother, daughter and grandmother. One night the daughter came home looking very down. "How did you get on tonight Dear?" asked her mother.

"Not too good," replied the daughter. "I only got $20 for a blow job."

"Wow!" said the mother, "In my day we gave a blow job for 50 cents!"

"Good God!" said the Grandmother. "In my day we were just glad to get something warm in our stomachs!"

三年级英语笑话故事带翻译

要是有一则笑话解决不了的事,那就两则笑话,看笑话,能让我们变得开心,今天小编为大家准备了三年级英语笑话故事带翻译,欢迎阅读!

三年级英语笑话故事带翻译篇一:

A mother saw her three-year-old son put nickel in his mouth and swallowed it. She immediately picked hime up, turned him upside down and hit him on the back, whereupon he coughed up two dimes. Frantically, she called to the father outside. "Your son just swallowed a nickel and coughed up two dimes!What shall I do? "Yelled back the father,"Keep feeding him nickels!"

笑死人的英语笑话段子

笑死人的英语笑话段子:What dog can jump higher than a building?Anydog, buildings can't jump!

笑死人的英语笑话段子(一)

Two Birds

Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which?

Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer.

Teacher: Please tell us.

Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow.

笑死人的英语笑话段子(二)

The New Teacher

George comes from school on the first of September.

"George, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother.

经典短篇英语笑话带翻译

爱笑的人,运气总不会太差,那么你喜欢笑么?这里小编收集整理了好些搞笑的经典短篇英语笑话带翻译,一起来看看吧!说不定能点中你的笑血哦!

经典短篇英语笑话带翻译篇一:I Wasn't Asleep

When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "Wake up, sir!"

"I wasn't asleep," the man answered.

"Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed."

"I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."

我没有睡着

当一群妇女上车之后,车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了,他担心这个人会坐过站,就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他,说:“先生,醒醒!”

英语笑话大全笑疼你的肚子

英语笑话大全笑疼你的肚子:Can you tell me what fish net is made, Ann?A lot of little holes tied together with strings. replied the little girl.更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!

英语笑话大全笑疼你的肚子(一)

Good Boy

Little Robertasked his mother for two cents。 “What did you do withthe money I gave you yesterday?”

“I gave it to apoor old woman,” he answered。

“You‘re a good boy,” said the mother proudly。“Here are two cents more。 But why areyou so interested in the old woman?”

“She is the onewho sells the candy。”

好孩子

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。

“昨天给你的钱干什么了?”

英语笑话开心一刻

英语笑话开心一刻:某日刘洪涛遇到外宾,上前搭话曰:I am hongtao liu,外宾曰:我TM还是方片七呢!英语笑话是不是很好笑呢?下面小编就为大家整理了英语笑话开心一刻,一起来爆笑吧!

简单搞笑英语笑话

生活中多点欢笑总是好的,今天我们就一起来欣赏欣赏简单搞笑英语笑话吧!

简单搞笑英语笑话(一)

你丈夫需要安静地休息

Doctor:Your husband needs rest and peace.Here are some sleeping pills.

医生:你丈夫需要安静地休息。这是安眠药。

Wife:When must I give them to him?

老婆:我什么时候给他吃?

Doctor:They are for you.

医生:这是给你的。

简单搞笑英语笑话(二)

三只乌龟

Three turtles decided to have a cup of coffee.

三只乌龟决定去喝咖啡。

Just as they got into the cafe, it started to rain.

它们刚到咖啡店的门口,就下起雨来。

The biggest turtle said to the smallest one, " Go home and get the umbrella."

带翻译搞笑英语笑话

带翻译搞笑英语笑话:Boss: I’ll give you RMB3000 per month and in 3 months, I’ll raise it to RMB6000.So when would you like to start?John: In 3 months.更多精彩笑话尽在美文故事笑话栏目,欢迎欣赏!

带翻译搞笑英语笑话(一)

A man sat at a bar, had the saddest hangdog expression.

Bartender: "What's the matter? Are you having troubles with your wife?"

The man: "We had a fight, and she told me that she wasn't going to speak to me for a month."

Bartender: "That should make you happy."

The man: "No, the month is up today!"

一个男人坐在酒吧里,伤心至极。

酒吧招待:"你怎么了?跟老婆闹矛盾了?"

男人:"我们吵了一架,她说一个月都不跟我说话。"

爆冷英语笑话故事

幽默的人不仅仅会说笑话,还要懂得他人说的笑话,来测试一下你的幽默细胞的指数有多高吧!

爆冷英语笑话故事一:把脚放进去

The school girl was sitting with her feet streched far out into the aisle ,

个女学生坐在座位上,脚却伸到课桌间的走道里

and was busily chewing gum,

嘴里起劲地嚼着口香糖,

when the teacher espied her.

被老师发现了

"Mary !" called the teacher sharply.

“玛丽!”老师严厉地叫她。

"Yes,Madam?" questioned the pupil ,

“什么事,老师?”这女学生问。

"Take that gum out of your mouth and put your feet in!"

“把口香糖从嘴里拿出来,把脚放进去。”

小学生英语笑话故事大全

爱笑的人,运气总不会太差,那么你喜欢笑么?这里小编收集整理了好些搞笑的xxx笑话,一起来看看吧!说不定能点中你的笑血哦!

小学生英语笑话故事【1】

"Madam," said the irate conductor to a totally incompetent woman cellist during rehearsal, "you have between your legs an instrument that could give pleasure to thousands…and all you seem able to do is scratch it."

Becky was on her deathbed, with her husband Jake at her side. He held her cold hand and tears silently streamed down his face.Her pale lips moved. "Jake," she said.

"Hush," he quickly interrupted, "don't talk."